During my worship to my Beloved Tara two days ago I felt a stirring and strong energy in my heart and, with closed eyes, I saw a flashing indigo color in my vision field; it gave me so much joy! It is so comforting when that happens! I thanked Her for my life and for her blessings; afterwards I played Fauré’s Requiem, which inspires me every time, and offered it to my Beloved.
My quest continues every day, as does my longing to “experience” what is beyond the image I chose. As I connect with Her, I send love to the areas of the world where there is a crisis; I have no power to change these crises, but hope that my thoughts and those of thousands of other people contribute to help.
Exploring what is beyond the image I worship, I was inspired by some readings:
In Chapter 2, Paragraph 2.2 of “Song of the Goddess, The Devi Gita: Spiritual Counsel of the Great Goddess”, translated and with an introduction by C. Makenzie Brown,. I was struck by the following: “I alone existed in the beginning; there was nothing else at all, O Mountain King. My True Self is pure consciousness, , the highest intelligence, the one supreme Brahman”
In Chapter 6, Supreme Reality of “Kali The Feminine Force”, by Ajit Mookerjee, I was in awe when I read the following: “In the Devi Upanishad“, the Supreme Goddess explains her true nature, that transcends all empiric existence:
“Great Goddess, who art Thou?
She replies: I am essentially Brahman (the Absolute).
From me has proceeded the world comprising Prakriti (material substance and Purusha (cosmic consciousness), the void and the Plenum.
I am all forms of bliss and non-bliss.
Knowledge and ignorance are Myself.
I am the five elements and also what is different from them, the panchabhutas (five gross elements: earth, water, fire, air, space aka akasha or ether) and tanmatras (five subtle elements: sound, sight, touch, smell, taste).
I am the entire world.
I am the Veda as well as what is different from it.
I am unknown.
Below and above and around am I.”In Chapter 2, Feminine Divinity”, “Kali, The Feminine Force”, I learned that “in India’s cultural diversity the vision of the sacred as woman has never ceased: “Women are divinity, women are vital breath”, asserts the Sarvollasa Tantra, aka Tantra.”
And again, “Women are the goddess, women are life….. Be ever among women in thought,” it is said the Buddha advised the sage Vasistha. Woman is the highest object of devotion. Her dynamic potency brings a vision of the goddess and of the Absolute. As the living embodiment of Sakti (Shakti) she shares in the creative principle. Her equal participation, even superiority, is essential to tantrism in every one of its aspects.
Whereas in the west, the madonnas are represented with veils and long gowns, the goddesses of the east are naked, their nakedness symbolizing nature. There are many sculptures of the yoni, the sanskrit word meaning “womb”, “source”, for worship, adoration, and pilgrimage.
The yoni worship is sometimes worshiped in conjunction with the lingam, a stone pillar in the form of a phallus, symbolizing the union of the feminine and masculine principles. There are yoni-linga shrines.
Also in Chapter 2, I read that “The linga (masculine) in the yoni (feminine) emerges from the yoni”, thus suggesting that the linga emanates from the yoni:
4. “The image of the linga-yoni does not, as is commonly suggested, convey the power of the active masculine principle by representing the penetration of the linga into the yoni. To the contrary, as Stella Kramrisch has pointed out, “the abstract geometrical shape … of the urdhvalinga (erect phallus) … placed on the yoni as its pedestal, rises out of the yoni, the womb; it does not enter it. The linga in the yoni emerges from the yoni…”
As for the fiercefull Kali, represented with a necklace of skulls around her neck, holding a severed head in one hand, and wearing a skirt of human arms, the explanation given in chapter 4, clarifies much for me:
Chapter 4, Manifestations of Kali:
5. “Her garland of fifty human heads, each representing one of the fifty letters of the Sanskrit alphabet, symbolizes the repository of knowledge and wisdom, and also represents the fifty fundamental vibrations of the universe. She wears a girdle of human hands - hands are the principal instruments of work and so signify the action of karma or accumulated deeds, constantly reminding us that ultimate freedom is to be attained as the fruit of karmic action.” The hand holding a severed head indicates “the annihilation of ego-bound evil force.”
Kali is at times represented in blue, at others in black.
For quite some time, I could not understand how the goddess Ramakrishna worshiped at the Dakshineswar Kali Temple in North Calcutta, now Kolkata, and called Mother, could be the “fierce goddess Kali.” Now I understand that his utmost devotion and longing led him to have a vision of the Divine Mother, or Universal Consciousness.
After this vision, “Ramakrishna perceived everything around him as full of Consciousness, as the embodiment of Spirit. The image of the Mother was Consciousness, the worship utensils were Consciousness, the altar was Consciousness, the door-still, the marble floor, he himself - all Consciousness.
What an inspiring experience! Now I pray to my Beloved, that I may draw closer to Her and feel Her presence in my life.
Oh, my Beloved, I pray that I draw closer to you and feel your presence throughout the day,
Besides learning from these ancient scriptures, I long to “experience” what my relationship with my Beloved really is. Recently something happened that was deeply moving for me. We all know how challenging quieting the mind can be: to help me with that, I do some exercises to disidentify myself from my physical body, mind, and senses, Recently, though, a question came to my mind: if I’m not my personality, not my body, not my mind, not my senses, then what am I, what comes after? And suddenly I understood that I am a consciousness, part of the Universal Consciousness, of which my Beloved is a part, and I am, therefore, part of my Beloved, and not separate. To understand that in a felt sense was so powerful and such a joy! And the description of Ramakrishna’s vision now is clear to me.
Onward!